by Nia McGee (UC Los Angeles), studied abroad in New Zealand

There is a green stone in New Zealand, often worn as a pendant, known by its Māori name, pounamu. The stone is carved into many symbols, each carrying traditional values like ancestry, harmony, and connection with the natural world.

The pounamu necklace I wear is a deep emerald color, shaped like a teardrop with a single twist at the top. This shape, the pikorua, represents lives colliding and everlasting friendship. It’s a reminder that no matter your diverging paths, you are eternally connected to these people and this place. The implication is that you may even return to each other. As I look back on my time at the University of Otago, this symbol has become my anchor.

Here’s a little about my journey and some advice to help you navigate the culture shock on both sides of study abroad.

Embrace the Silly Outsider Phase

Going into my semester abroad, I felt prepared. I’m an emotional person and a chronic journaler who scribbles through notebook after notebook. The UCEAP team had briefed me on navigating the new feelings I was expected to experience abroad. I was ready for the world to be different and to face a range of emotions.

To go abroad is to enter a world where everything may be new or different from what you know, and that can be as desirable as it is intimidating.

I adjusted to this amazing place in no time, even when the cultural differences exposed me as a “silly outsider.” I laughed at my continuous inability to stay on the left side of the sidewalk and at the Kiwi slang I couldn’t quite make out over the accent.

But I also fell in love with the bigger differences: the relaxed pace of life and the educational system. There was the way everyone seems friendly enough to pull over for you if you have a flat tire (on the left side of the road, of course!). Māori language and culture are also deeply intertwined with local life, a critical part of the country’s allure. Despite our differences, Aotearoa New Zealand embraced me. From surreal adventures like hiking across mountains and kayaking along fjords to routine moments like attending my David Bowie class or playing way too many games of Catan with my flatmates, every moment filled me with pure joy.

I belonged here. I felt I had unlocked a version of myself that was truer than anything I’d felt before.

The Part I Wasn’t Prepared For—Coming Home

It’s safe to say I did not want to leave. As time crept on, I grew more and more nervous about having to say goodbye. I wasn’t just leaving a country—I was abandoning an entirely new whānau, or family, that had become part of me. After what felt like such a short time abroad, I had established a routine I did not want to give up. Before I knew it, I was back in California, and I didn’t know what to do with myself.

Readjustment was so much harder than the initial move, and I wasn’t prepared for it.

Coming home, everyone and everything seemed exactly as I’d left it, yet I was a whole different person. The expectation that I should just jump back into my old life felt unnatural. I missed New Zealand. I struggled to stay present with old friends and found myself resenting how fast-paced everything felt again. It took me a while to understand that even at home, I would have to keep navigating new feelings.

Give Yourself Time to Integrate the New You

If you’ve returned from the time of your life and feel out of place, please know: It’s completely okay. Not only is it okay, it’s normal. If you are currently planning to study abroad, remember that coming home is going to be a large part of the experience. It doesn’t end when the plane lands, or even when you’re back in your old bedroom. Integrating who you’ve become into your old world is a difficult process and it can take time.

The good news is there are ways to help you with this part of the journey!

• Use your resources: The UCEAP team is still here for you when you come back, even if you just need someone to check in with.
• Get involved: Join the international education community at your school. It’s the best space to find other returnees who are likely feeling the exact same way you are.
• Find a creative outlet: Write, reflect, and share your stories. There are people who want to listen!
• Remember this doesn’t have to be your only chance to go abroad. There is always more world to navigate—even at home.

Pro tip: UCEAP offers a free Navigating Reentry online course that’s designed to help you reflect on and leverage your personal study abroad experience in a private, pressure-free way.

The Journey Continues at Home

I’ve been back from Aotearoa, New Zealand, for almost six months now, and I’m still readjusting. I still miss the land and the people who became such a giant part of my life.

I grew so much during my time abroad, but I know I am still growing. I’m learning to blend new ways of thinking with my old routines, which has opened up a whole new world at home. On the harder days, when New Zealand feels a world away, I cling to my pounamu necklace. It reminds me that even if our paths have diverged for now, the connection is everlasting, and the experience is forever with me.

See more advice on managing reverse culture shock and stories of adjusting to your new normal abroad:

• Expert advice on reverse culture shock and how to adjust to life at home after study abroad (hint: You’re not alone in this!)
• See what happens when you don’t feel culture shock on arrival, but all you feel is settled and normal.
• Many students feel homesick while on study abroad—let’s talk about that, too.